Week Six of Football – The Cowboys Are Driving Me To Drink
Football A**HOLES of the Week: Wade and Jason are the Scylla and Charybdis of the Cowboys! I simply don’t see a way for this team to turn itself around unless Wade and Jason go jet skiing in Mexico and are taken out by a drug cartel! The Dallas Cowboys The Cowboys lost again. Why am [...]
Week Five – The Real Cowboys Are Back
Football A**HOLES of the Week: Brett’s apology to his teammates went something like this “I’m so sorry that I actually showed another person, other than my long-suffering wife, my ridiculously small penis! Please forgive me! Let’s all sing a round of ‘Pants on the Ground!’” The Dallas Cowboys A few weeks ago, I declared that [...]
Week Three of Football – The ‘Boys are Back!
Football A**HOLES of the Week: [The Vikings] beat the Lions. Surely I don’t need to say more here. … I think [the Lions] actually played a mannequin at quarterback! The New York Giants I hate the GIANTS! I do! And, I hate Eli Manning! Why? The Giants – that’s obvious! They are one of the [...]
Week Two of Football – Just Shank Me Now!
Football A**HOLES of the Week: [Wade Phillips] shows about as much excitement during the game as a fat kid confronted with a platter of crudités for his birthday instead of cake! The Dallas Cowboys – They Want Me Dead! In their second game of the season, the Cowboys did what many elite teams in the [...]
Football is Back … What a F*&king Mess!
So I watched the first Sunday of professional football and it was … a f*&king mess! Football A**HOLES of the Week: Even I, a person who has never played organized football at any level, know enough about the sport to understand that with less than 4 seconds on the clock, you take a F*&KING KNEE [...]
